Ok, so CrossFit does a pretty good job programming the movements we use in everyday life, but I've noticed a few holes that could be filled in. Here are just a few examples of functional fitness exercises we think deserve a little more attention at your local box...
1. Balancing on one leg while holding something heavy.
We've all been there. You're carrying some sort of box or other heavy object, and you need to open the back of your car. You shift your weight...stand on one leg...prop up the other side of your load with your knee to free up one of your hands...and then try to lean back and out of the way to make room for the hatch of your car to open.
Sure, some may say that you should put whatever you are carrying down for 3 seconds and just open your trunk, but losing those 3 seconds is SUPER inefficient. I think we'd all be better off perfecting functional fitness exercises for future trips to the grocery store.
2. Prone to sitting in a weighted vest.
Some days just getting out of bed is the toughest thing you'll do all day. Why not train for it at the gym?
Surely, you'll be able to go from sleeping, to sitting up and wondering what in the world you're doing with your life a little easier if you've done functional fitness exercises with a 70lb weighted vest on...right?
Extra points if you do this WOD hungover.
3. Metcons On a Full Stomach
Let's face it...If I'm not in the gym, I'm eating. So how does it train me for the "unknown, and unknowable" if I've been able to schedule my eating habits around my workouts? It doesn't.
I want to know that I'll be able to lift a car off a helpless victim, and run 2 miles for help even if I've just eaten a supersized Baconator with fries.
As CrossFit says, "we fail at the margins of our experience," so make sure you're getting some functional fitness exercises in after plowing your way through a pile of tacos every once in a while.
4. Silence/Annoying Music
Working out at a box is great and all, but the music they play while you're working out is an advantage to say the least. Sure you may feel like a hero while setting up your bar, and listening to Thunderstruck, but guess what they have out in the real world? You guessed it...silence...and lots of it.
If you really want to be ready to function well in life, you'll need to get some practice doing functional fitness exercises surrounded by nothing but the de-motivational sound of grunting, straining, and pain.
...Or better yet. Get ready for a situation that is even WORSE than silence...Try doing Murph with the Sponge Bob theme looped in the background, or throwing down Fran while listening to Broadway show-tunes...etc.
If you're not ready to perform physical tasks without the usual deluge of AC/DC, Gangsta Rap, and Dubstep, you're not ready for anything.
5. Non-functional attire.
What's that you say? There's a fire on the 3rd floor of the orphanage? And you need help carrying the children to safety? Hang on, let me go get my favorite Lulu leggings on, and lets see...probably my Metcon 1s for this WOD in case there's a surprise rope climb...
As much as we all do our very best to walk around in gym clothes all the time, the very real possibility exists that you'll have to perform some sort of super-human task while wearing normal clothing.
To practice for this, we recommend showing up to your box dressed in random outfits at least once per week. Pull out your old prom dress, throw on your tightest jeans, or if it's a partner WOD, bring an old Halloween costume (the year you and your friend went as a horse).
Some people may think this is a stupid idea, but those people obviously don't care about saving children from burning orphanages.
Keep in mind that this list is not exhaustive. Let's work together to find ways to make CrossFit even more functional. Maybe someday we'll see some sort of functional fitness exercises with a fast food component programmed on the main-site, but until then...we've got you covered.
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P.S. If you're stuck on the idea of wearing functional attire to the box, you might be interested in a set of our new wrist wraps...
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